It’s the first time you get butterflies in your stomach, the first time you feel overly special, the first time you date and the first time you are with someone very very special- well, my dear you are in Love! First love seems like a fairytale and you do everything to be your best for your partner. It’s just like a fantasy, a dream come true, and when you meet that person something inside you tells he or she is the one truly meant for you! Your world revolves around them and it’s the best, most unexplainable feeling in this world.
Here are some tips for all those falling in love for the first time but are scared of falling apart before even starting!
Communicate about things
Don’t hide things from your partner; trust lays the foundation of a relationship. Be honest and open about things, this will help you navigate how to continue with situations and issues. Tell your partner about how you feel and your not-so-loved things. Also, it will help you get over those humps that you couldn’t seem to overcome for the first time. Don’t just accept what they put on your plate, sort the things that matters to you and then tell him about that. The best therapy of being happy in a relationship is- talking, so do the talking and stop thinking. Also communicate about the things your partner does and you don’t like! However a word of caution is- sometimes some things are best kept secret in a relationship (for the time being) and should be revealed only if and when needed. Over-communicating can sometimes kill a relationship.
Don’t lose yourself
The hardest thing is to be “you” when you’re in your first relationship. People show their best versions and often forget themselves. They tend to do things that their partner loves and ignore the things they don’t. Think smarty and act accordingly. (And don’t get me started on “I love him so much I will do anything for him even if costs my happiness…”) You’re an individual; you have different thinking and perceptions, likes and dislikes. Keep that in mind and tell your partner about that. Tell him or her that you’re not going to let them destroy your happiness. Do not forget your worth. Remember: You are not defined by your girlfriend or boyfriend, only you can define yourself!
You’re going to fight, so don’t freak out!
How many times you have felt “why are we fighting” or that “everything is falling apart”. Often right? Keep in mind that both of you are different and your views will not match at many instances. Even if you guys are compatible enough, still you may not agree on certain things. Coping up with small fights can be troublesome for newbies in a relationship. The conflict is inevitable don’t just keep crying for hours and starve yourself. If you fight, that’s okay, just keep calm and aim to resolve the source of conflict. It is better to go to the bed after reminding each other (a message will do the magic) that you love them and not let the anger blind you!
Maintain your boundaries
When you fall for someone, you trust them a lot. Do not negate the possibility of your partner being among those who are just having fun! Certain, most certainly is the foundation, however be cautious of the thought process and ideas of the other person about life in general. You should know your boundaries and make your partner aware about that too! Someone who loves you will wait for you to be completely ready to commit and get involved more.
You’re going to fight, so don’t freak out!
How many times you have felt “why are we fighting” or that “everything is falling apart”. Often right? Keep in mind that both of you are different and your views will not match at many instances. Even if you guys are compatible enough, still you may not agree on certain things. Coping up with small fights can be troublesome for newbies in a relationship. The conflict is inevitable don’t just keep crying for hours and starve yourself. If you fight, that’s okay, just keep calm and aim to resolve the source of conflict. It is better to go to the bed after reminding each other (a message will do the magic) that you love them and not let the anger blind you!
Deal with their past
Everybody has a past, if you are in your first relationship, perhaps he or she is not! So stop being over possessive and stop bothering about the ex-partners! Accept that they had a past but make sure it’s gone. Talk to them about that and don’t hide your feelings on this subject. Don’t fight with them either (because of their past), ensure that his or her emotional outlet is you! Different theories work in different relationships, understand that.
It’s okay if it doesn’t work out
Relax. Things could go right or wrong. First relationships have the capacity of engraving the memorable experiences in our consciousness. Relationships are time bound. Don’t plan your ‘forevers’ and ‘evers’, even if you do, understand that plans may change! Just be happy in the moment. Know that you can’t force someone to be with you! If nothing works between you two, it may better end. However, you will stay happily ever after with other great friends and your family.