‘Marriage is a triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience’ – Oscar Wilde
Matrimonial websites for second marriages have become immensely popular now. Indian patriarchy has been biased towards men and has always given them advantage of marrying the second time as compared to women. Women, however, are stronger now and are no longer financially dependent, thus are fearless to step out of a bad marriage.
End of one relationship should not be the end of love for you! Take chances and stay hopeful, give a second chance to marriage. Step into a new relationship with a clean head and heart and put your best in it. Here’s how…
Talk To Yourself First
You need to talk to yourself first. Why did your relationship end, what led it to end? So that you can set boundaries, new rules in your new relationship and work towards them at an emotional or practical level. You need to set goals for your new relationship. Don’t let previous issues come in your way. Seek help from your new partner, set goals for your new relationship and collectively works toward them together.
Don’t Be a Victim
Sometimes when you come out of your previous relationship, if it has ended badly, you tend to victimize yourself and carry the effects of your bad, abusive relationship into your new one. Don’t blame yourself for non-performance of your previous relationship. Everybody deserves a second chance. Take a new step!
Avoid Baggage, Step Out with a Proper Closure
Before you step into a new relationship close the first relationship completely; emotionally, socially and financially. Avoid the unnecessary baggage of previous relationship. Sometimes people come with a baggage in their new relationship with trust issues and strange patterns of their previous relationships. Don’t let that destroy your new relationship.
Talk It Out
You need to talk and express your feelings and thoughts to your new partner. Build that emotional level of confidence and intimacy. This can bring trust and security into your new relationship. ‘Being Vulnerable’ with each other makes your relationship stronger and can be viewed as a positive virtue sometimes.
Appreciate and Be Equal
Be equal partners in your new relationship. Appreciate and respect the efforts of your partner they are making in this new relationship. Women tend to put more efforts in making their second marriage work, experts say, as they don’t want their second time to be a disaster again. Don’t settle for anything less this time. Pay equal partnership. Cherish the new moments.
Role as a Step-parent
As a step-parent, you have to be more careful. It is a new relation and the kid is accepting a huge new change in their life. So as a stepparent you have to be more like a friend and supporter. Give them time so that they can open up with you. Don’t take stress, learn about their likes and dislikes from your partner and make things work out. Deal with them patiently.
Avoid Patterns
Avoid patterns of previous failed relationship in your new relationship. Talk about misunderstandings. Communicate with your partner. Don’t lack confidence in your relationship. Avoid divorce or breakup talks. Don’t let previous relationship overshadow your new relationship.
Celebrities who are successfully married second time
Aamir Khan and Kiran Rao
Aamir Khan divorced his first wife Reena Dutt and got married to Kiran Rao later. The couple has a son and are going strong. The two also professionally support each other in their aspirations.
Saif Ali Khan and Kareena Kapoor
Saif Ali Khan was married to Amrita Singh for 12 years. The couple has two children, Sara and Ibrahim. The two started having issues and didn’t get along and eventually got divorced. Saif married Kareena Kapoor later and the duo is going strong with a baby boy- Taimur.
George Clooney and Amal Alamuddin
George Clooney was married to Talia Balsam before marrying his second wife, Amal Alamuddin. The couple is a favourite of shutterbugs.
Sanjay Dutt and Manyata Dutt
Sanjay Dutt married Manyata after getting a divorce with his first wife Rhea Pillai. The couple is going strong and has twins. The two have been spotted sportingly each other strongly, in thick and thin.
Roy Kapoor divorced his wife Nandita and married Vidya Balan. They are happily married now and the look very comfortable and secure in each other’s company.
