“Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you was beyond my control.” –Destiny
Love is sharp enough to encompass a range of sturdy and positive emotional and mental states, for the most sublime virtue, to the simplest pleasures. It is the deepest form of interpersonal affection. Some people consider love to be inevitable, whereas some believe in the fact that it is possible to control who you shall fall in love with. However, I am of the opinion that one’s circumstances and environment shall define what they foster about love, which further delegates the said emotions. I happened to ask people of all age groups, who have been in love and even those who do not believe in love. Even then I got a similar answer, that falling in love is fate. After being called naive, and inexperienced in the database of love I would still like to believe that falling in love is free will. Fate, quite literally means development of events out of one’s control, and while looking out for love in life or a soulmate, we generally believe in fate. Researchers have concluded that Consciousness and Cognition Journals have found that people who believe in free will, feel ten times more passionate love towards their romantic partners. However, studies have shown that there is a positive relationship between passionate love and belief in the determinism of love.
Meeting someone is fate, because nobody can predict the future, or who they will meet and when. In my opinion, the events that follow, after meeting someone is pure free will. The circumstances and the environment in which these emotions bubble up, impact the deliverance of love. However, on doing the survey it is quite uncommon to feel that falling in love is free will. But after falling in love the actions driven to elevate that feeling is a choice. Nonetheless, it is definitely free will to make opinions on falling in love. But what is the difference between fate and free will when it comes to love and relationships? First of all it is very important to understand that fate is a required course of life. Life is synonymous to relationships, and it is by fate to be born. And destiny takes us how we are to be. However, it is free will to choose who we spend time with and with whom we maintain a relationship with. Secondly, fate decides the curriculum of life. But it is free will that we choose to elect.
~A Course of Life
Thirdly, fate shall not guarantee that one cannot guarantee the true meaning of love, for love is considered to be inevitable. However, it is free will that makes us aware about the parameters of love and thus the voluntary engagement which encourages love. It is love that makes humanity sustained, be it platonic or romantic. Be it fate or free will in falling in love, it is important to express. It is important to express love as Jane Austen has rightly said that:
(By: Dhriti Sharma)